Fading Twins
by mimsaysrah
Summary: Kaoru and Hikaru Hitachiin are twin brothers that have been close since birth. However, ever since Haruhi entered their lives, Hikaru, has been ignoring and ditching Kaoru. Kaoru babies this broken heart and does something that the two brothers will never forget. KaoruxHikaru
1. Vacant

_**Song of the chapter: Someone Like You - Adele**_

_**Fading Twins**_

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Haruhi…the only person that could enter Hikaru and I's world, and destroy it. I have to admit…I'm in love with my own twin brother but I know he loves Haruhi and not me. Every day I see him staring at Haruhi with such wanting and desire. My heart hurts from knowing what I can't have. Hikaru, your love kills.

"KAORU!" Hikaru shouted from behind me. I turned and saw my own twin running towards me. My own reflection. I stopped and waited for Hikaru to catch up. Once he did I began walking again. Hikaru didn't bother to make a sound which is the normal now it seems. Any other day Hikaru ditches me to walk with Haruhi. A sharp pain raced through my heart. Our bond is leaving…..it's disintegrating before my very own eyes. Is it sad to know that my own brother can't even tell that I've been depressed for the past few weeks? I've been more silent and distant and soon I might be just mute. I'm being torn apart. Our little routine at the Host Club is nothing more than a cruel reminder of what will never be mine.

Since it's after school, Hikaru and I were heading down the music room. We approached the door and opened it. Ignoring the blinding light, we both stepped inside. Immediately, Hikaru darts right over to Haruhi. I make my way slowly to Honey. Honey is the only one who knows my little secret so he knows how I feel right now.

"It's okay Kao-chan," Honey cooed, patting me on the back, "he's still your brother so that will never change." He smiled.

"Okay, I hear our princesses coming! Everybody ready?" Tamaki exclaimed.

As usual nobody cared enough to answer.

The girls flooded into the room. Honey with Mori-senpai, Tamaki with Kyoya, and Hikaru with…..Haruhi! My eyes widened and were hidden as I saw a flock of girls squealing over Haruhi being held by Hikaru like how he holds me for the girls. I slowly walked over there and just stood there until I was noticed by no not Hikaru but one of the girls.

"Kaoru? What's wrong?" She asked concerned.

At this time Hikaru jerked his head over to look at me. He saw the vacantness in my eyes, almost like there's nobody even there….which is half true.

"Kaoru, what's wrong?" He asked me. I held back tears after hearing that.

"W-Why are you holding, Haruhi?" I asked in monotone.

"I wanted to try something new. Problem?" Hikaru, you ignorant little…..

I smiled a lying smile, a sad smile that is trying to be happy and hide the sadness. My orange hair covering my eyes. My fists are clenched even tighter as I just stand there. He's leaving me out. He replaced ME with with her? This was OUR thing and he let her be a part of it…

I just shrugged. "Not really."

"Kaoru?" Haruhi cut in. Her eyes looking straight into my own. Just the sight of her really pisses me off right now but I can control my anger better.

Without answering her I just turned around still looking down at the ground and began walking away. I went through the doors, left the school, went home, entered MY room, and locked the door. I'm never leaving MY world. My world will be in this room since it's the only place I won't get hurt. I put in my ear buds and played Someone Like You by Adele. I started to sing it. My heart focused on Hikaru with every lyric sung.

_"I heard that you're settled down_

_That you found a girl and you're married now._

_I heard that your dreams came true._

_Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you._

_Old friend, why are you so shy?_

_Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light._

_I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited_

_But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it._

_I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded_

_That for me it isn't over._

_Never mind, I'll find someone like you_

_I wish nothing but the best for you too_

_Don't forget me, I beg_

_I remember you said,_

_"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,_

_Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead, "_

_Yeah_

_You know how the time flies_

_Only yesterday was the time of our lives_

_We were born and raised_

_In a summer haze_

_Bound by the surprise of our glory days_

_I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited_

_But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it._

_I'd hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded_

_That for me it isn't over._

_Never mind, I'll find someone like you_

_I wish nothing but the best for you too_

_Don't forget me, I beg_

_I remember you said,_

_"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead."_

_Yeah_

_Nothing compares_

_No worries or cares_

_Regrets and mistakes_

_They are memories made._

_Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?_

_Never mind, I'll find someone like you_

_I wish nothing but the best for you_

_Don't forget me, I beg_

_I remember you said,_

_"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead."_

_Never mind, I'll find someone like you_

_I wish nothing but the best for you too_

_Don't forget me, I beg_

_I remember you said,_

_"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,_

_Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead."_

_Yeah_

The song ended…and I was drowning in my own tears.

Hikaru….you make me feel…..pathetic.

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Like it so far! :3


	2. Forgotten

_**The song that came into my mind while writing this was Forgotten by Avril Lavigne but oh well. I don't own Ouran but...i do own this lovely pizza that im eating at the moment!**_

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_**Fading Twin**_

I sat there on the host club couch just lifelessly watching the two lovebirds flirting and doing their new routine. I clearly got no sleep because the bags under my eyes have proven myself right…sadly though. Everyone noticed my new outlook on life but Haruhi and Hikaru. Ugh just saying their names like a pair makes my mind burn.

"Oh Hikaru stop!" Haruhi laughed with a deep blush on her face as Hikaru tickled her sides.

"Never! " Hikaru shouted back.

**88888888888888888888888888**

"_Kaoru, if you want me to stop, you have to say the magic words!" Hikaru laughed. He tackled me to the snow and straddled me, making leaving not even an option._

**88888888888888888888888888**

"Please, Hikaru!" Haruhi gasped in giggles.

"You have to say the magic words, Haruhi!" Hikaru teased.

**888888888888888888888888888**

"_H-Hikaru, I-I love y-y-you!" I squealed._

_Hikaru stopped tickling me with a huge smirk on his face in victory._

"_Now was that so hard!" He teased me. I smiled sheepishly blushing._

**888888888888888888888888888**

"Haruhi, say it!" Hikaru pushed on.

"F-Fine! I love you! Happy now?" Haruhi blurted out.

Hikaru smiled wide where his eyes were closed.

"Perfect." He answered her.

I just sat there taking it all. I slowly turned into a pathetic self-pitying fool. I barely blinked. I could feel anything. Not even my nerves. I have forgotten to live.

Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months. Hikaru has truly forgotten that he has a brother. I don't even show up to the Host Club anymore. I barely eat. My uniforms look like a dress on me now. I'm doing my body wrong. It takes everything I have to just sit up when I'm laying down. Hunny and Mori come over every once in a while to make sure I'm okay. They never want to leave me alone for even a second.

I lay there in bed with my arms behind my head and just staring up at the ceiling. I slowly scoot up so im now sitting with my legs dangling off the side of the bed. I rub my face in my cupped right hand and close my eyes. Not shortly after that, I heard the front door slam shut followed by some giggles and stomps. I stood up to have my vision almost darken. Dammit, I got up too fast! I shook it off and made my way down the hallway and at the top of the steps where I could lean on the railing. You see, ninja.

Haruhi and Hikaru were on the couch watching something on youtube…

"Winry: You're both retarded!

Alphonse: Why thank you for your concern, Winry, you're a wonderful friend!

Winry: You nearly got yourself killed you freakin gwunk!

Alphonse: Well it's not like we planned for that to happen you know. We didn't just go, "Oh you know what, let's be mutilated, that sounds like a fun way to spend the evening."

They both laughed at the randomness. I chuckled too myself because it was funny after all.

I stopped chuckling whenever I saw the two making out. Not wanting to vomit I headed back to MY room. Yes, MY room. I collapse on my bed and instantly fall asleep.

I woke up thinking about that video. My mood was good. However, that happy mood certainly didn't last long enough for me to make it through the whole day with a smile. I was at my locker putting my books away. I closed my locker after a sigh. Turning around I ran into Hunny. He had a plate that had its food covered in some bowl like object.

"Kaoru! Look at what I made!" Hunny exclaimed. He lifted off the top and behold…..carrots?

"Carrots?" I asked.

"Carrots." Hunny confirmed my guess.

"Carrots."

"Carrots."

"Why did you make carrots?" I pondered.

"Because I did." He shrugged and smiled, waving goodbye to me then went running off in search of Mori.

I was now home and I remembered Hunny running in search of Mori. I instantly became so lonely and cold. I doubt Hikaru would go around the city in search for me….. I slowly slid my eyes closed while sitting on the corner of the bed. The window in front of me was playing a saddening lullaby. The taps of the rain hitting the window was echoing throughout the house. The sky cries for me tonight. Not because of how I feel….._I pulled out a pocket knife from inside my pillow case_…but because of what I'm about to do.


	3. Requiem

_**I DO NOT OWN OURAN!...However I do own this epic moustache necklace my friend got me! I feel proud! :P**_

* * *

**Fading Twins**

"_Brother! No! Please don't go! Please! Help me! I'm going to…NO HIKARU DON'T LEAVE WITH HER AND NOT ME! PLEASE PLEASE COME BACK!" I kept crying and outreaching my hand to Hikaru's back as he's walking away smiling with his arms intertwined with Haruhi's._

_I feel somebody tapping my shoulder. I turned around and saw death smiling at me with those broken teeth showing._

I woke up with a gasp. The sunlight was dimmed by the grey winter clouds. I could literally smell snow on its way. I was sweating and harshly breathing. I could sense that the house was empty. So….I am all alone after all…..I sniffled.

I threw the covers off of me and stood up on the freezing ice cold hard wood floors. I hissed and wanted to go back to bed but I toughened up and put on socks. I stumbled around and headed down stairs. My cell phone rang. I had on eye closed due to full drowsiness. I answered the phone.

"Ugh…hello?" I asked in a husky voice.

"KAORU!" I flinched at the voice explosion coming from my phone.

"What is it Tamaki?" I asked itching the back of my head.

"Haruhi, she won't listen to her daddy anymore!" I could hear him crying but in a childish like way.

I felt my heart being tugged on. That's probably because she's too distracted by…I clenched my teeth tightly together and narrowed my eyes.

"Kaoru! What do I do?" Tamaki whined.

"You're going to go home, have a bagel, and go to sleep." I said coldly and hung up.

Honestly. As if I'd want to talk about the little bitch…I sighed and made my way to the bathroom. I started to take off my clothing and just as I was about to take off my shirt, I saw them. The evidence of neglect and lowliness. Thin red marks carved up and down my arms stopping at my elbows. I didn't put any on my forearms just for safety reasons though….. I shook my head and shoved the shirt off of me. I'm a childish fool…I turned on the hot water and stepped inside the shower.

I walked into the host room. My eyes closed and I had a long sleeved thin jacket on. I made sure nobody touched my arms. I couldn't chance the pain. I walked passed Mori and Hunny senpai.

"Mori…..Kaoru seems cautious today. I hope he's okay.." Hunny worried with little tears in his eyes.

"Yeah." Mori said while his gaze continued to follow me.

I lied down on the couch and closed my eyes. I felt really sleepy. Soon I fell asleep on the host club couch. Where _anybody _could see me and my terrible flaws.


	4. Frozen

_**I don't own ouran…yap yap blah blah dribble dribble dribble!**_

* * *

**Fading twins **

I woke up. The light was dim but I heard whispering voices from the great darkness.

"Mori, is Kao going to be okay?" Hunny senpai asked worried.

"Hunny, he'll be perfectly fine." I heard Tamaki reassure the little boy from a distance.

"Those scars…why?" I heard Haruhi asked herself in shock. That voice…..which means….

"TAMAKI! WHAT THE _FUCK _HAPPENED TO MY LITTLE BROTHER!" Hikaru snarled.

I tried to hold back a tear. He has no right to call me _his brother_…

I heard a slapping sound. Everybody gasped. I was so tempted to open my eyes and see who got slapped.

"Hikaru Hitachiin, shut you're fucking mouth!" Tamaki…."You hurt my son with your own arrogance. You abandoned Kaoru." Tamaki was crying…."You've been ignoring him for the past seven months! You…..He…and.." I could hear awkward silence. Tamaki was crying….crying for me…..

I heard stomping going up stairs and I felt sudden light pressure upon my marks. I flinched and mentally kicked myself.

"It's okay Kaoru, he's gone. Open your eyes." Tamaki said smoothly. I fluttered my eyes open and Hunny senpai attacked me. Kyoya pushed his glasses too his eyes and went back to writing down random crap in his handy dandy notebook.

"I….I'm sorry…." I whispered.

"Don't be Kao-chan-" Hunny started but I cut him off with a startling scream.

"I'm sorry!" I jumped up making Hunny fall to the floor and burst out of the house into the falling snow. I assumed I was at Tamaki's house. The snow stung against my bare scared arms. I kept running though. I heard people screaming and the crunching of snow following me. I lost them when I approached some woods. I darted zigzag like throughout the trees. I found one tree with its trunk hollow near the ground. I scooted under it and hugged my knees to my chest. I closed my eyes. This will be the last time they ever see me.

"KAORU!" They all called in different directions and some close to me but the blizzard was so intense that they couldn't see me among the shadows of the tree's trunk. "KAORU!" Just go away. Please. Hurry and go. I don't want to hear your voices anymore. I've been nothing but a burden to you all! I covered my ears with my hands. My attempt at blocking them out was working until that is…..

"Kaoru!" Hikaru screamed. The elder twin was defiantly worried. He kept calling. Please, Hikaru, just go. I don't want to hurt you anymore…."Kaoru!" I heard crunching snow come slowly towards me. "K-Kaoru…." I heard sniffling. The footsteps stopped behind the tree I was inside. I was sitting in a cave like side while he sat on the outside in the opposite direction. I could hear him sit down. He was so close but was so far from me, so far out of my reach….."Kaoru….where are you?" He whispered.

_I'm hiding from you. _I answered mentally.

"Why would you leave and just run off?" He asked as if he'd get an answer. Nothing but the cold cold and raging winds answered with cries.

_Because I want you to be safe. You are everything to me; this is why I have to leave._

I started to sing in my mind the song I wish I could sing to him right now…

_**Under the ash and the lies…..**_

I looked at my scars..

_**Something beautiful once here now dies…**_

I think of me and Hikaru's bond. It ended so quickly…

_**And the tears burn my eyes…..**_

I sat there crying silent cries. I dug my nails into my hands every time I tempted to just get up and rush over to him and say "I'm OKAY brother! Look! I'm sorry! Let's go home like we used to and just mess around!"

_**As you sit there all alone, I just wanna come home….**_

Hikaru…

_**But you see the shelter as the storm, holding winds to keep you warm….**_

Hikaru just go home! You'll die out here! I cried too myself! Tightly clenching my eyes shut.

_**You are everything to me, this is why I have to leave….**_

I heard Hikaru get up slowly.

"Maybe he's back at home." Hikaru said to himself and started to run towards the edge of the forest. I stepped outside of the tree trunk and watched as my mirror self-had his back faced towards me not knowing that I was still here. Watching him. Silently hoping he would sense my presence and turn around and look back….but he didn't. Soon I saw nothing left of him. The blizzard rage on and I collapsed in the snow. Coldness overwhelming me at last….I continued to look forward where Hikaru's body disappeared. I slowly and silently sung the last part….

"So sleep well, my angel….." I slowly closed my eyes as death overcame my body. It's so cold…will you come back for me…big brother? I honestly….don't want you to. I screamed in despair and regret on what I just did but it was too late to change my decision and everything went black.

_**Sleep well, my angel….**_


	5. Written Thoughts

_**You know what I'll say so let's get on with it shall we!**_

* * *

**Fading Twin**

_~~ Hikaru's POV ~~_

I sat there, not knowing what to say. Kaoru…he's-he's gone. Is he dead? Is he alive? Is he slowly turning into grandma's famous blueberry pie? Who the hell knows? I just realized I rhymed…..happy moments gone. I held my head in my hands. _Think, Hikaru, think! There's gotta be something! Anything that could help me with Kaoru's feeling and intentions. A note? _I squeezed my eyes shut. Focus….focus! My butt began to feel uncomfortable since I've sat like that since I got home. I Began to pace everywhere around the room. Something-ANYTHING! With frustration and confusion as I searched through shelves, drawers, and any other storage space, if I found myself with nothing I smashed that item. I now stood beside Kaoru's bed. I slowly began to devastate _our _ room…well…I guess you could say, Kaoru's room…I moved out of this one so I didn't have to face him. I couldn't bare it, seeing that face of his looking at me like he felt betrayed. Why is he acting like this?

"Why!" I screamed slamming my fists upon the pillows.

A loud knock came from the pillows when my fists connected to the sheets. Pillows aren't hard…I knelt down and placed my right hand into the pillow case and felt a hard back book cover along with…I jerked my hand back pulling out the brownish red journal and a knife. I closed one eyes then got up to tend my wounds.

I came back and ignored the knife. Picking up the journal, I opened it in the middle, turned a few pages, and began to read.

_Journal,_

_It's me again, Kaoru. I'm sure you're tired of my writing down the same story over and over again. Almost like an animation taking place in slow motion, because though I write the same story upon your pages, I add something new to the end every day. _

_Hikaru replaced me with, Haruhi. It's been five months and I can't stand sleeping. Every time I do, I dream horrible dreams. The dream is about how Hikaru and Haruhi are walking together having the time of their life. However, I'm running after him with my arm stretched out painfully tight calling his name. He couldn't hear me. I kept crying. I could stop running either. Then death appeared and smiled at me with those broken and shattered teeth and greyish pale skin. He never says anything though, he just smiles. Then I wake up. Hikaru isn't around anymore to comfort me and stop the nightmares from coming back. I miss him, I really do. _

_My heart is broken. They say 'Home is where your heart is.' Well…..Hikaru found a new home and now I'm left homeless. I know it's taboo ad sick in so many ways…but…I'm still madly in love with him…with my big brother._

_I must be going now. _

_Sadly,_

_Kaoru Hitachiin_

I sat there shaking. I reread the letter thousands of times. H-H-H-He l-loves me? I felt extremely uneasy but for some reason my heart plunged into total darkness. Do I dare read another entry? I took in a deep breath and turned the page slowly.

_Journal,_

_You're my only pal. The only one who understands everything about me. I'm skin and bones, I quit the Host Club pretty much, I almost died last night from blood loss, and now I hear that a blizzard is coming. Perfect. It'll remind me how cold my heart has become over this short period of time. I'm useless indeed. Not needed. Just a waste of space in this world, but every now and then I think of the quote from Hugo…_

_**I'd imagine the whole world was one big machine. Machines never come with any extra parts, you know. They always come with the exact amount they need. So I figured, if the entire world was one big machine, I couldn't be an extra part. I had to be here for some reason. And that means you have to be here for some reason, too.**_

_It comforts me I guess. I gotta go….bye!_

_Desperate,_

_Kaoru Hitachiin_

One more….I'll read one more….

_Dearest journal buddy,_

_This will be my last entry. I'm leaving. Leaving everything and everyone behind. I need to get away from here. If I don't, I know that I'll eventually….never mind. I'm leaving tonight during the blizzard. I'll head for the downtown city first. That way I won't die from the freezing snow. Wish me luck and I hope we meet again someday my beloved friend!_

_Pumped,_

_Kaoru Hitachiin_

He planned this….all of this….he knew what he was doing from the very start. He doesn't need me and my help. He can take care of himself. I won't be there for him for the rest of his life…

'_We know.' My mind answered. 'You haven't been for the last seven months.'_

'_You left Kaoru, all alone, and you still are because you know exactly where your little brother is and yet you still refuse to go after him'_

"I'm not going after him," I stood up and left the journal on the bed open and exposed. I left the room and walked down the hallway. "not this time."


	6. Protect

_**Bleh…..u.u**_

* * *

**Fading Twins**

I left it all behind. My friends, my school, the host club, my knives, my journal, my home, my old life, and my brother. I couldn't take it anymore there. One of two things would've happened. I would've killed myself or gone insane. Wait….didn't I collapse in the snow? How am I able to still think? Is this heaven? Could it really be? If so, now I finally have a chance to apologize to poor old, Flippy. It's not my fault that the fish jumped through the onion ring and onto the ground…I tried to pick him up but he kept slapping me in the face…maybe he wanted to die…no….wait! What if it was actually a girl fish! Oh man! No wonder he/she didn't like me! I forced my fish to be a transgender! Why do I have the power to make people look like the opposite gender! First Haruhi and now this! It's just too much! Flippy! I'm sorry! My poor goldfish! I guess I went insane after all…..I felt warm arms underneath me. It felt like I was floating. I tried to scoot closer into those warm arms. I couldn't open my eyes though.

"So you're finally awake huh?" A deep husky voice said with a hint of a smile. I couldn't respond. It was just too cold. Am I a snowman to? Awesome. Kaoru, the snowman. Is the nicest ginger you'll see. He has amber eyes, and likes hot guys, Oh yeah I'm gay whoopee! I started singing my own version of Frosty the snowman. Maybe I really am going insane…"Don't worry, we're almost home."

Home? NO! I don't want to go back! I weakily struggle and shook my head with tears threatening to fall down my face making the cold winter air seep into my open pore and freeze me over. My poor Kaoru the snowman song…..it's ruined! Bastard….The man held me closer so I wouldn't fall.

"Shhh don't cry. It'll be okay." He whispered in my ear making me shudder. The man smirked. How do I know that? I just do.

I felt the man stop walking and then I heard the jingles of keys. Okay seriously..is this going to be a Christmas special? Jingle bell, jingle bell jingle bell Fuck, It's not Christmas time, you do this all the time….. The man interrupted my song yet again by opening up the door and a gust of warm air tickled my nose. I barely opened my eyes. Nothing but orange filled my vision so I opened them a bit more. Still to blurry. I opened my eyes completely and saw a pretty log cabin with a fire place burning and an oval wool rug near it so you can sit by the fire. The man walked inside the cabin with me still inside his arms and gently placed me down on the rug. The rug was comfy, I'm not gonna lie. I stretched a bit and looked up at the man and saw him for the first time. To my surprise, the _boy _was no older than me. He had beautiful violet purple eyes, black hair all choppy like, and his eyes were almost invisible behind his bangs. Pale skin like mine, taller than me, and thin but buff. He was gorgeous! However, due to my broken heart…I couldn't look at him like that. I didn't blush, nor did I show signs of being captive in his looks. He smiled and rubbed the back of his head in the awkward moment.

"Hey, um before I start explaining everything, it looks like you need some food. I'll be right back. If you get bored you can play with Rex." He chuckled the last part and disappeared behind the door. I heard glass and doors opening and closing. I looked around the room.

The place wasn't trashy nor was it beautiful neither , There was a glass coffee table with a boothed couch behind it. The walls had picture frames everywhere on it. The windows were foggy but seeing the snow building up in the corners made it beautiful in a way. A mouthwatering smelt wafted into the room. I took a big sniff and sighed truly pleased. A few minutes later the boy walked out with a steaming plate. He made his way towards me and happily handed it too me. I walked over to the couch and sat in the corner part of the booth. I thanked him and began to chow down.

"I see you still haven't met, Rex, yet. Haha" The boy observed.

"R-Rex?" I asked him with a puzzled look on my face.

He only smiled and whisteled. Out of no where a little weasel came scampering into the room and stopped at the boy's feet.

"This is, Rex." He introduced.

"He's a weasel?" I asked.

"He's a weasel." He confirmed.

"He's a weasel!" I shouted excited.

"He's a weasel…" He repeated confused.

"Why is he a weasel?"

"Because he is."

I laughed. That just reminded me of Hunny's little confusion with the carrots…then my laughing stopped. Hunny…..

"So what's your name?" He asked me. I looked up and saw his purple eyes piercing into my own. I shuddered. I looked down at the weasel.

"K-Kaoru." I answered stuttering. I felt a light blush on my cheeks. What the? NO! No blushing, Kaoru! I mentally slapped myself. "Kaoru Hitachiin."

"Nice to meet you, Kaoru. My name is Zero ." He smoothly replied.

"Zero?" I asked looking up at him and noticed that he was looking at Rex as well. He lifted up his head and looked at me.

"Hmm?" He asked.

"How did you know I needed help?" I asked feeling my cheeks fire up again. DAMMIT KNOW!

"I was walking through the woods because I heard screaming, then I found you on the ground almost blue, and here we are." He answered.

"Oh…I see." I held my head in my hands. My bangs covering my eyes as a single tear fell to the floor.

Zero noticed this and I felt him wrap his warm and protective arms around my bed pulling me close to his chest. He buried his face in my hair and held me closer. He was so warm. I couldn't stop blushing. This was beginning to be too much for my little heart. Maybe I was in heaven…FLIPPY!

"Never again…." Zero said in an angry and firey voice. It sent chills down my spine. How he said it made me feel safe. "…never again will I let anything else hurt you. I'll protect you, Kaoru."

"W-what? Z-Zero, what are you talking about?" I asked almost scared yet dazed.

"I know what happened, Kaoru. Your brother…..he-he hurt you terribly. He never knew you loved him. He abandoned you. Treated you like dirt and never looked back when he left the forest. That to me is unforgivable!" He was shaking in fury. I gulped.

"H-How did you kn-now that, Zero?" I asked shaking just barely.

"Kaoru," He said softly that made me melt. "I go to your school. I was there in the forest. I've always watched you from afar. The way you looked at your brother. You're not a hard person to read."

"Z-Zero, I" I started but got cut off by warm and reassuring lips. Z-Zero was kissing me? My face was completely red. I didn't kiss him back, I was too shocked to. He pulled away after a few minutes and looked me in the eyes. His eyes were violating my soul. As if every secret was being told to him. I continued to blush more and more.

"I'll protect you, Kaoru."


	7. Teased

_**It's July 4**__**th**__**…I have explosives! :D**_

* * *

**Fading Twins**

I woke up tangled in bed sheets. Lying next to me was the beautiful, Zero. His arms were wrapped around me tightly pulling my back closely against his chest. So warm…..I guess he was still asleep. Don't worry, my boxers are still on. I closed my eyes and sighed. _Nothing happened. _I rested my head back down onto a pillow making the side of my neck arch up slightly. All was quiet and still except for the sounds of animals walking around in snow. Cold air touched my skin leaving goosebumps, in reaction to this, I scooted closer to Zero, whom reacted by hugging me closer.

After a few minutes, I decided to get up. Escaping Zero's grasps was too tricky. Each time I got loose he'd hug me tighter! Ugh! I need to work out! As I was failing at my attempts, Zero flipped over making me lie on my stomach and his chest still to my back. Perfect. Utterly perfect. I attempted to push myself up but then I felt a pair of lips kissing the side of my neck. They were so soft and gentle on my skin. It hypnotized me and I stopped what I was doing immediately. Zero chuckled wrapping his arms around my lower waist still keeping us on our stomachs.

"Now why would you interrupt my slumber, Kaoru?" He asked in a husky voice. He brought his lips to the side of my neck again making the ability to speak nearly impossible.

"I-I-I….." Zero, lightly bit the curve part of my neck in-between my shoulder and where my neck stops. I gasped making fists in the sheets. I felt his lips turn into a smirk against my neck. Crap. I tried to resume speaking…."I-I'm..hungry?" The uncertainty in my voice was clear as day. Zero's grip of me got tighter.

Zero, kissed my neck again then bit it. I gasped. He started to lick down my neck. I thrashed around weakly to escape. I can't enjoy this…Kaoru be strong! He kept one hand at my waist and brought one up under my shirt making his hand come out from my collar. He held my chin to keep my head still. He whispered my name sending chills down my spine. He placed his lips once again at the side of my neck and bit where my pulse was. From there he began sucking on my pulse. Pleasure swept throughout my body. I closed my eyes tightly. I moaned a sigh quietly. Zero's hand that was wrapped around my waist slid down to my hip and gave it a little squeeze. I had no breath in me now. He bit my neck one more time and then I let out a moan. I panted after that. Suddenly, Zero stopped and got off of me. I turned over to look at him. He had a pleased look on his face.

"Gosh, Kaoru, it's time to get up! What are you doing in bed this late?" With that he spun around on his heel and entered the bathroom.

I sat there completely confused until it clicked. I jumped out of the bathroom screaming at the top of my lungs.

"You bastard! Don't tease me so you'll get the shower first!" I screeched.

"SORRY!" Zero laughed.

I glared at the bathroom door.

_****_

_**~~ Hikaru's POV ~~**_

The bell rang. And I got up plugging my ear buds in my ears and turned on shuffle. First song that comes on had me stop dead in my tracks and swallow a huge gulp.

_"When I see your smile_

_Tears roll down my face I can't replace_

_And now that I'm strong I have figured out_

_How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul_

_And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one_

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

_It's okay. It's okay. It's okay._

_Seasons are changing_

_And waves are crashing_

_And stars are falling all for us_

_Days grow longer and nights grow shorter_

_I can show you I'll be the one_

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

_Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart_

_Please don't throw that away_

_Cuz I'm here for you_

_Please don't walk away and_

_Please tell me you'll stay woah, stay woah_

_Use me as you will_

_Pull my strings just for a thrill_

_And I know I'll be okay_

_Though my skies are turning gray_

_I will never let you fall_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven."_

The song ended. I was just frozen in place. Why did-did I only think of, Kaoru during this song?


	8. Invitation

_**You know what's sad? I was thinking, "I'm too scared to write an Elrcest fan fiction. What if everybody hates incest and disses the story?" Then I realized what I already was writing and went like, "Oh…..yeah…." lol**_

_**I sadly do not own Ouran but I do own a Pikachu… ._.**_

_**Le Gasp**_

* * *

_**Fading Twins**_

I was bored. Enough said really. Kaoru's gone, Haruhi and I broke up, the host club hasn't been open due to Kaoru's disappearance, and I'm stuck in history. Oh joy. I buried my head in my arms as I rested on my desk. Class was slow especially since the teacher is preparing us for a special guest speaker that will be coming in today to talk about his club. I guess that club is in desperate need of members to continue to even exist. Hmmmm. The clock's hands seemed to have taken a huge leep towards the next number when I looked up again at the time.

_11:45_

Oh good god, thirty more minutes. The class was talking now about fifteen million different things in every direction. I had no one else to talk to. None of the girls want to talk to me ever since Kaoru disappeared from school…..nobody did actually. I'm okay with this context actually considering I'm used to being alone. It's been three weeks since Kaoru left. That little runaway brother of mine….. The door opened and through it entered a tall handsome boy. He had choppy black hair and violet purple eyes. Oh great, a pretty boy. All the girls screamed at the sight of him and already whispered that they would join the club already. Oh joy, a club full of retarded fan girls and a pretty boy as their leader, I weep for humanity. Wait….Host Club….yep…..still weeping for humanity.

"Good morning." The boy greeted.

The class responded with dreamy sighs from girls and annoyed curses from boys. Still weeping for humanity…

"I'm here to represent my club. To get to the point, it's cooking club. Haha yes I know that it may seem boring but once you're out on your own there's no turning back, you _have _to know how to cook-"

"I'LL JUST BUY FAST FOOD!" A boy blurted out from the intrigued group of students. The boy's eyes narrowed at that and stared directly at that boy with slight annoyance and understanding.

"Yes, do that for the rest of your life and you'll find yourself lying in the hospital from a heart attack with too much sodium and obesity. Not only that, you'll go broke from constant money spending. Finally, if you have to, going out into the wilderness will test your food skills. Considering that fast food restaurants won't be randomly existing in jungles anytime soon, I'd advise you to think of a new plan." That boy finished with a small smile that showed that he was above such ignorant freshman. His eyes were closed but when they reopened they were looking directly at me. I shrunk back into my seat, trying to avoid those interrogating eyes. A girl raised her hand and his eyes were off of me in a second. I felt like I was free to breathe again. I shivered. Who was this guy?

"Yes?" He asked her. She lowered her hand down to the desk she was sitting at and blushed a raspberry red.

"Umm….who is in charge of this club?" She asked shyly.

"Me, of course." He smiled at her making that blush of hers sky rocket into blood red.

Time went on and on with him describing the the times and competitions the club goes to. Fundraisers will happen throughout the school year so they could raise enough money to go on a vacation somewhere during the summer. Surprisingly it sounded really fun but the stubborn me kept me back from listening to him anymore.

He held up a stack of papers and passed them out individually to everyone. He went down every row giving each person a smile as he placed the light orange sherbet paper onto their desks saying '_You're wlecome_' each time somebody said '_Thank you_'.

When he got to me, however, his smile faultered just a little bit and his eyes once again rested onto my own. It was as if he was trying to search for something like a little invisible lie that my eyes held. I gulped and he left me. I could tell that he disliked me but why? He doesn't even know me! I looked down at the paper he handed me and scanned it. Something caught my eyes and I decided to actually slow down and read it thoroughly. It read:

* * *

_**B.C.F.F. or (Best Cooks For the Future)'s Fun Night**_

_B.C.F.F. is going to have a family fun night to celebrate the club's success over this school year! Anyone can come and it's fun! There will be games, contests, and of course plenty of food!_

_**When: **__7:30 PM – whenever you feel like going home._

_**Where: **__The local park._

_**Date: **__Friday, October 12, 2012_

_**What to bring: **__A jacket (it may be chilly) and an empty stomach!_

_**Cost: **__Completely free!_

_Any questions or concerns about B.C.F.F.'s fun night, please contact Mrs. Harrison_.

Mrs. Harrison

**Work**: 555-777-1234

**Cell**: 555-867- 5319

Thank you

* * *

I kept rereading it mostly because I didn't want to look up and see the boy staring at me again. After he got done explaining the fun night, he held up a piece of paper with boxes on it.

"Okay, so you can sign up for the club right now if you want. Just put your first and last name, age, gender, and grade on this here piece of paper. _If _you are not entirely sold on joining the club and still wanting to go to the fun night, even for just a second, this paper will be there incase you change your mind."

The girls swarmed up there pens in hand and struggling to be first. Oh humanity, how I weep for you. The men stayed behind looking around to see if anybody else is going up there so it wouldn't be just them. If not now then probably at the fun night event. Men are such cowards…. I had my chin resting in my palm and was just leaning into my hand. Boredom is a complete crime. After the girls finished their little war and sat back down into their seats, the boy packed everything up and said his farewells, but before he completely left a girl blurted something out.

"Hey, what's your name?" She asked. The boy stopped and turned around with a smile.

"It's, Zero." With that he walked away.


	9. Storm

_**DO NOT OWN THIS BURRITO NOR SANDWICH! also Ouran...damn! I love reading everyone's reviews! Yes I think Zero is an amazing character also I do love the comedy in this story...its there so shoosh!**_

_**enjoy!**_

* * *

_**Fading Twins**_

* * *

I was writing a poem while I waited for Zero to come back home. I don't go to school anymore. Instead, I have Zero teach me what he knows. I wouldn't be able to take the sight of Hikaru and Haruhi snogging in a corner somewhere. That disgusts me completely. Leaving your only brother…..I continued to write.

* * *

_A locked heart is hard to bear,_

_When you have a brother that doesn't care,_

_About your health, about your mind,_

_About how you left the world behind,_

_To wave you off like a fly,_

"_Annoying pest, just go die."_

_To love a brother, to love a twin,_

_Is the taboo for my disgusting sin._

* * *

I smacked my pencil down on the table highly irritated. That damn twunk. Instead of heart ache, I only feel annoyance and fury. Maybe I can go to school…..I hear the door open and close softly, clicking in place. Rex came scurrying out of the bedroom and into the kitchen to greet Zero. Now that I think about it…..where are Zero's parents? Where are his mum and dad? Zero walked into the room with a huge smile on his face.

"Welcome home, Zero." I said happily standing up to give him a hug. Zero wrapped his arms around my waist holding me close.

"Thank you, Kaoru." He thanked in my ear sending chills down my spine. This guy, I swear…

"How was your day, Zero?" I asked sitting back down and folding up the piece of paper quickly so Zero wouldn't read it. Sadly, Zero noticed it and ripped it out of my hands. He unfolded the paper and read my poem. His face softened but had a little sadness and anger in his expression.

"It was creative and busy. My club is going wild trying to prepare for tomorrow night." Zero put the poem back onto the table and looked at me. "Kaoru, you're coming tomorrow night, right?"

"Of course!" I exclaimed excitedly. It's been so long since I've been out of this house!

"What if you meet your old friends there?" His gaze locked onto mine. I'm guessing my expression was hurt and angry.

"I'll avoid them, duh. There's no way I'd ever go back to them!" I over exaggerated.

_Yes you would. You know you'll cry if you see at least one of them._

"What if, Hikaru, was there?" He asked.

_Hide._

"Ignored him and have a good time." I lied.

"The girls?" He continued.

_Maybe I should stay home…_

"Listen, Zero, if you don't want me to go-" I started.

"No! No! I'm not trying to scare you from coming. It's just that…I don't want you to get hurt again." Zero reasoned. I closed my eyes and sighed.

"Zero, I'll be fine." I smiled up at him. Zero returned the smile. "So, what's for dinner?"

"I figured that I'd just order a pizza.." Zero mumbled.

"That sounds lovely." I chuckled.

I still want to ask him about his parents but…..is that too rude? Should I wait for him to tell me? What if it actually isn't important and doesn't tell me? There are so many questions bouncing around inside my head. So many 'What if…' and 'Should I…' questions. What do I do? Sometimes the answers wont come if you don't ask the questions.

"Z-Zero?" I stuttered looking down shyly.

"Yes?" He responded picking up the phone and dialing a number.

"Where are…where are your parents, Zero?" I blurted out. I quickly covered my mouth.

I watched Zero freeze up and just stare at me blankly. He wasn't really looking at me. Someone was on the other end but Zero didn't respond to them either. It was as if Zero turned into a statue. Finally after a few agonizing minutes, Zero hung up the phone and walked away into the bedroom, slamming the door after him. What did….I do? I buried my face in my hands and just sat on the floor.

It's been four hours since I asked Zero that question. I was outside on the porch just sitting with my knees hugged into my chest. Weather here is weird. We had a blizzard and it's not even December yet. I guess it's just my heart being shown to the whole world. It was cold I must admit but I didn't care. I deserve to freeze to death. Anywhere I go I only cause pain and wars. I'm a cursed twin I guess. My eyes felt heavy but I fought through the battle of exhaustion and bitter cold. Cold won. A warm cover wrapped itself around me startling me for only a few seconds until I heard Zero sitting down next to me.

"You'll get sick you if stay out here any longer you idiot." Zero said quietly. I looked over and saw Zero in the same position as me, not bothering to look over at me. "There was a nasty storm…" Zero mumbled.

"What?" I asked stupidly. Zero still didn't look at me.

* * *

**_Zero's POV_**

I sat down next to Kaoru. I feel bad about acting like that to Kaoru but I wasn't expecting him to ask me something like that. It caught me off guard. I didn't look at him. I just focused my eyes upon the woods, the trees nearest to the bak. Their shadows cast an eerie spell to those who look at them. Will something come out of those trees' shadows? Who knows really? I continued to watch the trees as I was about to tell Kaoru everything. It hurts to try and explain but for, Kaoru, I'll do it.

"It was a nasty storm…" I mumbled. This caught Kaoru off guard as he looked at me.

"What?" He asked. I kept looking forward.

"My parents. They died in a nasty storm." I repeated.

"Oh….it's okay. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." Kaoru almost whispered.

"No, no it's okay, I want to." I sighed. I closed my eyes and began my story. "When I was nine…."

* * *

**_** Flashback **_**

* * *

_I was in bed. The rain was pounding against the window while wind roared in the air. I hid myself under the covers thinking that nothing could get me. Every so often I could see my own hand because lightening would strike. The thunder was like a lion fighting for dominance. My little body shook. I wanted mum and dad but they weren't home yet. This storm hit quicker than predicted. Nobody else was around since I'm a single child._

"_Mommy!" I screamed out when I heard a crash coming from the kitchen. I began to cry in desperation. "Daddy!" I called again. No one answered. No one was coming._

_I could hear sirens coming and going. Power was out, so I couldn't find out what was coming my way or not. Endless groans and screeches came from the house walls and roof. The windows continued to protest against the storm. _

"_Mommy! Mommy! Where are you, mommy!" I kept calling out as if I'd receive an answer. "Daddy! AAAAAAAAAH!" _

_I screamed. A loud crash came in through my window. A tree branch had fallen and now I could feel the wind and rain first hand. My covers were now drenched. Noise entered my ears. It was as if I was in the middle of a war. The thunder was the bombs, the lightening was the explosion, the wind was the after affect, the sirens were the alarms of a bomb coming, and the rain was the blood. I went into shock. I couldn't move. I was still terrified, but I kept calling out for mum and dad. That was the only thing I could still do. _

_I didn't know if I felt tears or the rain against my skin. Either way it stung my skin. Every time I tried to get up and seek shelter, I was pushed back down. I was in the fetal position like a trapped wild animal about to be slaughtered for meat. That's when I heard a siren stop at my house. I could see the revolving flashing lights from a police car._

"_Hello! Zero? Hello?" Called out a man's voice. I was too scared to speak. I couldn't answer him. "Search the house! Go!" _

_I could hear them. The police and whoever else was here, searching for me. Doors opened and closed. Humans fighting nature. Finally, a man kicked down my bedroom door and spotted me in the corner shaking. He rushed over to me and wrapped a towel around my body then picked me up. _

"_I've got him!" He cried out to everybody. _

_He rushed out of my room and jumped around the obsticles. Tables were on the ground and picture frames were shattered with the pictures soaked. I saw only one intact and it happened to be the family photo. I whimpered and struggled to get it. The guy held onto me tightly though. I thrashed around violently until he accidently dropped me. I dived for the pictured landing on broken glass. I grabbed to picture frame and hugged it closely to my now bleeding body. The man grabbed me again and again ran throughout the house until we made it to the front door. We shot out of the house and behold my eyes an ambulance, random strangers, cops, and other people and cars were there. The man now walked over to the paramedics and handed me over to them._

"_It's going to be okay son," One of them reassured me. How did they know I was here?_

"_Where's mum? W-where's dad?" I asked drowsily. I didn't know what was going on. "Where are they? Where?" Panic began to wash throughout my body._

"_We don't know son but please relax or else these wounds will get worse!" He tried not to shout. I looked down and saw crimson everywhere on my body. Cuts and gashes decorated my skin as if I were an arts and crafts project. While I was distracted, the paramedics injected me with some sleeping medication. I instantly felt weak and drowsy. Soon, I could barely keep my eyes half open._

"_Sir, the boy's parents were found in car that had been flipped over into a ditch. It was a DOA." Some woman said._

"_Oh dear. This poor boy…." The paramedic pitied. Then I was out._

* * *

**_** End of flashback **_**

* * *

I finished telling the story and found myself crying. When did this happen? I quickly wiped the tears away but Kaoru already noticed. He grabbed my wrist and pulled it away from my eyes. He examined my face getting closer and closer.

"Zero, don't cry." He whispered. Kaoru held me close to him rubbing my back reassuringly. "I'm sorry that happened. It'll be okay. I promise." He continued. Without thinking, I pulled away from him and held his face in my hands. Then, I leaned down and pressed my lips to his. Kaoru froze but finally he gave in a kissed back.

"Kaoru, I-I love you." I whispered.


	10. Reunion

**_I hope everybody had an explosive Fourth of July! I know I did! :3 All throughout this story, I've only been thinking about Forgotten by Avril Lavigne. lol A perfect song don't you think?_**

* * *

Night struck the city. Torches were lit every three feet throughout the park. Yes this text is being written in red (not when i post this though) and I'm having pudding. Got a problem with it? Okay now onto the real story!

* * *

_**F**__**ading Twins**_

* * *

Night struck the city. Torches were lit every three feet throughout the park. Yes this text is being written in red and I'm having pudding. Got a problem with it? Okay now onto the real story!

Night struck the city and torches were burning away from each other every three to five feet. People began to gush into the park as couples. Hands holding, smiles on their faces, and laughing like their world will never end. While I just sat there on a picnic bench like my whole world stopped. Zero, I guess you could say, is my lover? I don't know. Something caught my eye. I turned my head and saw two girls slowly coming towards me. SHIT THAT'S AN OLD CUSTOMER! Play it cool, Kaoru. Act like Hikaru and you'll be okay…

"K-Kaoru?" One of the girls asked.

"No it's Hikaru." I said nonchalantly. Ha! The perks of being a twin.

"Oh." The other girl said coldly. What the? And with that they walked away. Well, that was….bizarre?

"KAORU!" I turned my head over to see Zero jumping up and down while his arms waved in the air. I smiled and walked over to him.

"What is it, Zero?" I chuckled. It seems like it's been years since I've smiled.

"Could you help me with something?" Zero asked. I looked at him curiously with my mouth slightly open.

* * *

_**Hikaru's POV**_

* * *

Glares and cold shoulders. That's all I got from everybody, well except for the host club. Tamaki was flirting with Haruhi and other girls, Hunny and Mori were eating cake, Kyoya was writing (how typical), and as for me? I was just walking around aimlessly just seeing what all was here.

"H-Hikaru?" A girl announced. I turned around to look at them with a puzzled look. I was looking at two girls.

"H-How did you change clothing so fast?" The girl asked.

"What are you talking about?" Getting a little frustrated.

"You were over there near the food tables, sitting on a stone block! You said it yourself that it was you! So how did you change clothing so fast…" I drowned her out. An imposter? Someone acting like me? That could only mean….I ran off. "Hey!" The girl yelled.

"Kaoru." I yelled to myself.

Kaoru's POV

I stood there next to, Zero, as he entertained a crowd. His cooking skills were amazingly impressive. He could do a five men's job! I gawked at him until I almost fell down whenever a plate of Chinese food was shoved into my face. I blushed and took my fork to eat a bite of the steaming food. I blushed at the taste! I lightly moaned at the taste.

"It's delicious!" I screamed. I took the plate and ran off with it laughing like a maniac. I heard people clapping and laughing as they watched me escape with a plate of steaming food. After a few minutes of running, I found a content spot in front of the river to sit down and begin to eat. It was truly delicious indeed! Of course it scorched my tongue and throat whenever I swallowed it down but who gives a toss?

"You know, mother always said to not eat like a wild animal in public, Kaoru." I heard an all too familiar voice behind me. I spun around dropping the plate onto the concrete, shattering it into millions of tiny pieces.

"H-Hikaru?" I stuttered silently as my big brother came walking out of the shadows.

"It's been a long time," Hikaru stopped to look at me dead on," Kaoru."


	11. Shattered

_**I'm gonna starting doing this below vv so you can get the theme of the chapter lol**_

**Song of the chapter**: _**It Ends Tonight – The All American Rejects**_

* * *

_**Fading Twins**_

* * *

We both stood there. No wind to break this intense silence. Hikaru just stood there waiting for me to respond. What could I possibly do? Zero wasn't here. I'm trapped. I'm like a trapped wild horse. My breathing began to pick up without any hesitation. I bit my lower lip. No, no this is all wrong! How could I possibly still have feelings for my older brother? He's a douchebag! No no he's a douchesilo! I narrowed my eyes. Who says we have to even chat. I don't have to explain myself to him. Pshaw.

"Kaoru," Hikaru started with a stern voice not taking his eyes off of me for even a second. He took one step towards me while in response I took one back. Broken glass was scattered everywhere. Huh….Lion King moment indeed…..only…..where's the fire? Dammit, Kaoru, get it together!

_NO! I refuse to!_

_Dammit, now's not the time, Kaoru number 2!_

_Why do IIII have to be Kaoru number 2?_

_Because I said so!_

_You'd make a wonderful lawyer Kaoru number 1._

_You'd be a wonderful case!_

_Point taken._

_I see what you did there!_

_Sigh…_

_Look, now's not the time for this argument!_

_Bye._

…

My head is a very complicated one indeed.

"Kaoru! Answer me!" Hikaru roared. I flinched back just a little in response to his demanding tone.

"W-Why should I?" I cried back almost making a screeching sound. Hikaru's eyes widened.

"Kao-"

"NO! _HIKARU_!" I shot back at him. "I'm tired of this! I'm tired of feeling this towards you when it's obvious you don't feel the same way! STOP DOING THIS TO ME!" I started to cry and glare at him. "This is all your fault! YOURS!" I was literally sobbing now. How Hikaru understood me was beyond me.

"K-Kaoru…I'm sorry-"

"No! You're not!" I kept cutting him off. "Don't even start with that load of bollocks, Hikaru, don't you even fucking _dare_!" It felt so great to get this off my chest. This feeling made me feel free! "Just leave me alone, okay." I said more like a command then a question.

I began to turn around to walk away but damn my gravity issues, I slipped on a shard of glass and collapsed in the middle of the sharp materials. Crimson took up most of my vision. My own blood was oozing everywhere. Great, just fucking perfect. I tried to get up but my body wouldn't let me. I screamed in pain. I felt somebody's presence above me soon I felt a pair of arms gently and carefully pick me up and out of the puddle of death. I couldn't think straight. I blacked out before I could see who it was.

* * *

**_Hikaru's POV_**

* * *

"Kaoru!" I saw my little brother bleeding there on the ground. I began to run towards him but it appears that somebody beat me to it. The boy turned around with Kaoru in his arms whom was out cold.

"T-Tamaki." I gasped. Tamaki narrowed his eyes at me and didn't speak a word. Then Kyoya appeared without writing in his little booklet.

"Kyoya, get a ride ready. We're going to my house." Tamaki ordered in such a serious tone.

"Already did. It should be here in just a few minutes." Kyoya confirmed.

"Good." Tamaki said not once changing his tone of voice. He then looked back at me with an icey stare. "Hikaru, you will explain _everything _to us when we arrive. Understand?" I couldn't do anything but nod my head. With that, Tamaki turned around and continued to carry my brother in his arms and walked away near where the road is. I could only stand there. Only one thing ran through my mind.

_Kaoru._

* * *

_The walls start breathing_

_My mind's unweaving_

_Maybe it's best you leave me alone._

_A weight is lifted_

_On this evening_

_I give the final blow._

_When darkness turns to light,_

_It ends tonight_

_It ends tonight._


	12. Purity

_**I do not own Ouran Highschool Host Club along with any of the songs that I say are this chapter's theme. I wish I owned Ouran Highschool Host Club but Japan and I have not come to an understanding yet and by understanding, I mean that I haven't even tried yet. Anyways...**_

_**Song of the chapter: Behind These Hazel Eyes – Kelly Clarkson**_

_**WARNING! Very serious chapter indeed. You've been warned!**_

_**By the way. I know I update these chapters quickly but it is because I have already wrriten most of this story. So I am just trying to get the ones I do have done, posted. I don't think that's all that bad really lol. Speaking of stories that I have done, I have another fan fiction to get on here to. I'll explain later. Right now it's story time! YAAAAAAAAAAAY! xD**_

* * *

_**Fading Twins**_

* * *

Snow was falling. Each flake that touched my bare skin brought back pleasant memories. I could actually feel each flakes existence just like the memories they brought back, however, when a flake landed upon my jacket that memory was blurry. I knew it was there but I couldn't tell if it was actually the wind just blowing against my body making me think they're really there with me. My thoughts are like snowflakes in many many ways. Snowflakes are like memories. They exist one minute then disappear out of my life the next.

I was a little boy. My big hazel eyes saw nothing but white. Grey shadows and white flakes. I couldn't feel warmth in my hands like I usually would. Why is that? I turned my head and saw that nobody was standing there next to me. It was then that I realized that my left hand was sticking out to the side in a position where it looked like my hand really was being held. I could feel warmth there. I know…I just KNOW that something or someone else is here with me now. Why can't I see it? I don't like to be alone!

My body took a life of its own. I jumped out in a jerk and fell to the ground. I was shaking and whimpering. Why was I alone? Where's Zero? Where's…anybody? My eyes kept scanning around but no life made itself visible let alone known. A single tear was about to escape my eye but the bitter chill in the air stopped me from trying to cry. W-Why can't I cry? I can't understand what's going on!

"Kaoru."

I heard a whisper. Something was whispering my name. I looked around frantically. Where is this being? I can't see it! Again and again it softly kept whispering my name but my efforts didn't help. Was I being made fun of? Why would somebody do that to me? I've been through enough already dammit!

"Seems like just yesterday you were a part of me. I used to stand so tall. I used to be so strong…" The voices began to sing oh so softly. They kept singing. "Now all that's left of me is what I pretend to be. So together, but so broken up inside."

"Why are you singing this!" I screamed covering my ears with my hands.

"Swallow me then spit me out. For hating you, I blame myself. Seeing you it kills me now. No, I don't cry on the outside. Anymore…" They started to sing in a mocking like voice. It was like they turned my feelings into a song. My feelings about Hikaru… "Broken up, deep inside. But you won't get to see the tears I cry. Behind these hazel eyes." They all stopped singing. Dying silence was all that's left when finally,"Kaoru."

"What? What do you want from me?" I cried out into the wonderland of pure white snow.

"This is a place where you can no longer cry, no longer feel, no longer age, no longer worry, no need to feel fear, and no longer be broken hearted. This is the light you desperately reached for when you fell upon the glass. You went towards the light. This is your purity world. The more and more you get closer to this light the faster this purity will melt."

I couldn't understand this. Does that mean I'm..

"Dead? Yes." They answered my question nonchalantly. All color left my face. I'm…dead? I'm dead? NO! I CAN'T BE DEAD! NOT YET! NOT NOW! I tried to cry but I couldn't, it hurt so much when the tears refused to flow. The white snow began to turn maroon and violet. Lightening cracked throughout the deaf air. Wind came and tried to pick me up. What is this place! I turned around and ran. Ran for my life. I had to get away! I had to! Where! I'm dead aren't I! Please, somebody save me! I tripped over things that were hidden beneath the snow. I tripped over a picture frame of me and Hikaru, a mitten we both wore, a hat that we used for our childish games, and then something sharp jabbed into my boots. I fell over and cringed in pain. I thought I wasn't supposed to feel! I looked at what I tripped over and saw that it was a knife. An old dirtied knife with my old blood on it. I just kept staring at it. The longer I looked at the shining metallic blade, the less I became aware of my surroundings. Wind blew, making a few strands of my hair fall into my eyes. I lifted up my hand and wiped away those annoying strands. Something wet replaced those strands. My pupils became extremely small as I slowly lifted up my hands. They were shaking incredibly fast but I could still make out what was in my hands. The crimson glared off of the full moon's light. Wait…full moon? I looked around and saw that a light pale orange moon was right there bright as day in the purple sky. The snow was replaced with blood. I began to shriek. I felt pressure on my shoulders. I couldn't help but thrash around.

"HELP ME!" I cried out.

"Kaoru!" a distant voice called. I ignored it and just kept screaming and thrashing. "Kaoru! KAORU! WAKE UP, KAORU! KAORU!"

* * *

My eyes flashed open and I bolted up almost instantly. My breathing was deep and heavy while sweat just danced down my skin. I covered my face with one hand while my other hand was supporting me from the back. I just kept gasping for air while my body shook.

"I-It was just a dream?" I choked out. I was completely terrified. I've had nightmares before but that was just….just too insane and traumatizing. It was then that I felt a pair of warms hands holding my shoulders from behind me. I held my breath and slowly turned my head to the side. I saw ginger hair, hazel eyes, pale skin, tear stained face, and the beast that shattered my heart like it was nothing. Somehow by looking at Hikaru, I was able to get a hold of myself. I worry about the dream later. My eyes narrowed and the atmosphere was poisonous. Hikaru raised his hand to stroke my hair but I shot up off the bed before he had anytime to touch a single hair on my head. Where's Zero? ZERO!

"K-Kaoru, please stop running away from me!" Hikaru cried. Fresh new tears fell from his eyes. "Look I'm sorry, Kaoru! I'm sorry that I'm such a complete asshole. I'm sorry that I'm the worst big brother ever in the world. I'm sorry that I hurt you. I'm sorry that I can't change the past. I'm sorry! I'm so so sorry!" Hikaru was sobbing.

"H-Hikaru…." I muttered. I've never seen him like this before. "Don't cry. Please don't…" Wait, why do I care if he cries! I should be happy that he finally understands what I've been through! But dammit, I'm not that cruel of a person. Fuck. I reached a hand out to stroke Hikaru's soft ginger hair but Hikaru's hands caught my wrists tightly. "Hikaru?" I asked looking up at him.

"And I'm sorry…I'm sorry that I'm about to do this." He whispered almost angrily. I was about to ask him what he was talking about but my answer came quicker than I thought.

Hikaru smashed his lips to mine. The warmth of his lips against mine was enough to make me melt. Hikaru slowly slid his eyes closed content with this feeling. Hikaru slowly backed me up against a wall pinning my hands above my head. He bit my lower lip wanting entrance but I didn't grant it to him. I was too shocked. Hikaru…just…..kissed…..me!

"Kaoru, I think I'm in love with you. No, I know I'm in love with you." Hikaru slightly smiled as if saying that lifted a ton of weight off of his shoulders. Hikaru kissed me again but quickly and lightly.

"Hikaru…what are you saying?" I just couldn't believe it. No this had to be a trick!

"I'm in love with my twin. My little brother. My other half." Hikaru replied. By this time I was already swept off my feet. I've been waiting to hear those words for so long. Hikaru was about to plant another kiss on me until we heard it. The sound of metal clicking for aim. Hikaru and I both looked up at the source of the noise. There before our eyes was, Zero, holding the gun out with both of his severely shaking hands with tears pouring down his face in a furious rage. He was glaring at both of us. He was aiming his gun at both of us. He didn't think about us separately but rather as one single thing. I grow tired of those same eyes and thoughts! Hikaru and I are separate people! I gulped down a huge lump in my throat and pulled away from Hikaru, whom was too petrified to even notice. I held up my hands defensively and gave Zero a small smile in hopes that it would calm him down. Sadly, it didn't. I realized something though. Zero's aim wasn't on Hikaru…it was on me!

"Zero?" I asked a little shocked.

"Just shut up!" Zero shrieked.

* * *

_**Wow this chapter seems a whole lot more different than any of the other chapters. This one was seriously intense. :P Oh god, Zero! Put the gun down! Calm down! ZERO! Bad! Bad!**_

_**Freezing Pain. I'm working on a Fullmetal Alchemist fan fiction story as well but not yet posted. I'll tell you when I finally post it on this website! xD **_

_**I proudly thank everyone who has reviewed this or commented on this story so far. Your thoughts on this story keep me going! haha I call them comments not reviews so...yeah thank you for the comments! xD**_

_**Well, I'm off to eat spicy chicken! BYE! Lol XD**_


	13. Shock

_**Why hello there! :)) There is a song that would only be able to fit this chapter perfectly but it's best without a song. :)) I really hope you all are enjoying this story! **_

_**It's almost over sadly. TT_TT**_

_**I DO NOT OWN OURAN HIGHSCHOOL HOST CLUB! I wish I did, I really do, but...I don't. u.u**_

_**Happy Reading!**_

* * *

_**Fading Twins**_

* * *

_Rain rain go away,_

_Someone please kill me today,_

_I can't stand this heartache,_

_Kill me now before I break,_

_Rain rain wash away,_

_All the pain I feel today._

* * *

Hikaru jumped out at Zero. He threw a few punches but not once hitting Zero. Zero dodged every attack as if they were nothing. This made Hikaru all the more pissed off. Hikaru lunged for the black haired boy but Zero evaded the assault and slammed the handle of the gun against the side of Hikaru's head. Hikaru stumbled forward by a few steps then collapsed. Zero looked down at my mirror reflection and bared his teeth. He lifted his leg and kicked Hikaru in the stomach causing him to fly back towards me banging his back against the wall. Hikaru didn't respond. I went over towards my big brother to see if he was okay, but I heard that locking sound, the sound of a gun cocking, and stopped where I was and slowly turned around to face Zero.

I couldn't move my own body. It shied away from the gun but no matter where I sidestepped, the weapon would still follow me. I don't even think the gun was aimed right. You could literally feel the excitement in the atmosphere. Such intense air made thinking nearly impossible. I didn't know what to do. However, while this was going on, my attention was mostly focused on Zero's eyes. Those shaking eyes with small pupils that gives off a vibe to others that no one should touch him. The same eyes I had when Hikaru was ignoring me, as he was slowly but surely leaving me behind for Haruhi. Zero, is heartbroken. Zero, is in pain. Hurting all because of me and my wants. If I never loved Hikaru, then I wouldn't have left in the first place, never meet Zero, and never be in this current predicament. I slightly narrowed my eyes with a warm soft touch. My body stopped shaking and was filled with understanding. This is my responsibility. I caused this so I have to end this before anyone else gets hurt. I unclenched my fists and slightly looked back at Hikaru who was still lying unconscious. I returned my attention to, Zero. It was then that I took my very first step towards Zero.

"S-Stay back!" Zero panicked seeing that I advanced towards him slightly. His finger curled a little tighter against the trigger. Once more my eyes moved near the edges to see if Hikaru changed any. Dammit, Hikaru!

I was frozen in place, not by fear but rather by caution. My body was in a bird like position. Balancing most of my weight on one leg while my back was bent forward making my face look towards the ground in a bowing like way. I was looking up with my mouth slightly parted to take slight breaths of air. At this point I'm not even sure what could set him off or frighten him. I stayed like that for who knows. My eyes never left his. I held my breath and took another small step. Zero, took a step back. Good, he's fighting with himself. Now he's confused on what to do. I took this opportunity to make a dash for it. I jumped out of my careful bird like pose and began literally leaping towards him. Death is only a single move of the muscle away.

I jumped up slamming my body into Zero's. We both tumbled over on top of each other. I was straddling him with his gun pressed up against my chest. The barrel pressed right over my heart. I could do nothing but just look down at the wide eyed boy. It was like seeing a child about to get hit by a car. I could hear faint cries from the back of Zero's throat. My eyes only grew softer. This poor boy…. Zero's body was continuing to shake uncontrollably as he tried to get out from underneath me completely oblivious to the gun he was still holding. I knew the only thing on his mind was to get away from me as soon as possible. He's acting exactly like me when I first went insane and cut myself. Since I was straddling, Zero, I lightly rested my hands on his shoulders ignoring the gun. I had him pinned. When I touch him, it's like all strength leaves him. Zero, slowly lowered his arms moving the gun away from me and began to sob.

"Get away!" He cried.

* * *

**_Zero's POV_**

* * *

"Get away!" I cried considering the gun again. Why can't I fight this? Why can't I ever stand up against, Kaoru? I melt any time he touches me! I could only cry and shout. "Get off! Get away! I hate you! You're doing this to me! I loved you! You chose Hikaru over me after he hurt you! What did I do to make you turn your back on me?" I couldn't stop. It was as if somebody opened the flood gates and never bothered to close them again. Kaoru still kept that soft and saddened expression on his face making this even harder on me. What was I thinking? Kaoru loving me? I already knew that he loved , Hikaru, but I thought we were lovers! Dammit, why do I keep losing everybody!

"Kaoru!" I screamed. Kaoru looked a little caught off guard after hearing me use his name. I took the gun and shoved it into his hands making him aim at my heart," Shoot it out! It hurts too much, get it out of me! My heart can't take anymo-"My pleads were muted by a pair of soft warm lips. I gasped and my eyes became wide again. I stopped thrashing around and became almost quiet. I didn't kiss back because I was too stunned to make any type of movement. I felt the gun back into my hands and pointed at Kaoru. In a flash, those lips were gone, leaving a bitter chill on my lips. Was he mocking me?

"Zero, I could never do such a thing. Especially to you." He murmured.

"I-I thought you loved me…" I whispered looking away from Kaoru's burning stare.

"I did and still do but my place is here with, Hikaru. Him without me is like the rocky earth without water. We rely on each other almost for granted. I'm sorry, Zero, but I can't be with you." He finished choosing each word carefully.

"But…but you two are brothers! You already have each other to start with! It's not fair!" I accused. Kaoru closed his eyes with a small smile and lightly chuckled.

"Yes that is so, however, Hikaru and I want to be more than just siblings. Even though we'll always have each other, when we grow old enough to leave the house and be on our own, life will have other plans for us. As time goes on, Hikaru and I wouldn't be able to see each other every day. We'd have jobs in other towns and countries, be too busy with our own families, and be with new friends made along the way. As tempting and fun as that all may seem, Hikaru and I don't want any of that. All of those outcomes are actually a 'duh' too most people. They would say that life always worked that way but we don't want our life worked that way… We only want each other, nothing more." Kaoru finished. His eyes still closed with that same smile on his face.

I calmed my eyes to an understanding position and slightly smiled. This boy is the only one who can calm me down with such ease. Hearing his voice is enough to make me soothed. I do have a broken heart and still feel envy and bitterness towards Kaoru and Hikaru but I know I'd do the same if I were in Kaoru's shoes. Who am I to say that I know how it feels to love a sibling? They've been all they had since birth. They understand each other more than anything. I can't bring myself to shoot them, especially Kaoru. I sighed a smirking like sigh that meant '_Wow, I can't believe I was such a childish idiot. Haha, oh wow._' Just as I was about to apologize to Kaoru, the door slammed open, making me look away from Kaoru and watch the tall blonde boy appear from the hallway. I sighed relieved and looked back at Kaoru, who was now shaking and gagging. What the…

"Kaoru, what's-"I started but then gasped before I could finish.

I felt a drop of liquid splash near the corner of my right eye. Kaoru's eyes were consumed by pain and his whole body coiled. I have forgotten all about my gun! The loud noise scared me and made me pull the trigger and shoot Kaoru in the chest! He was screaming in agony. Tamaki was already at Kaoru's side trying to help him. He was completely ignoring me for the time being. He whipped out his cell phone and dialed three buttons. Somebody on the other line answered and Tamaki immediately began shouting into the phone with information about the emergency. I was crouching next to Kaoru. Luckily I didn't shoot Kaoru's heart but either way it's just as deadly. Kaoru was gasping. He was too freaked out to calm down. I heard grumbling from the other side of the room. Hikaru woke up with his hand rubbing the side of his head. When Hikaru opened his eyes finally realizing what the commotion was about, he squealed in terror at the sight of his little brother tangled up on the ground bleeding. Hikaru, shot up and slammed the side of his body against mine replacing me with him. I fell over onto the ground and just watched Hikaru screaming for his little brother to hang on.

"Kaoru!"

* * *

_**For some reason I kept picturing that scene with Roy Mustang choking up and hesitating to kill the small Ishvalan child during the war. It's Fullmetal Alchemist episode 13. "Fullmetal vs Flame" **_

_**...I guess I have to make a disclaimer for that as well...**_

_**I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist! That goes for any other fma or fmab reference I make on this story. including...**_

_**The only song that I think fits perfectly is Regret from Fullmetal Alchemist.**_

_**Now I'm finally caught up. It will take a little while now until I finally post a new chapter!**_

_**But always remember...**_

_**Bagels are your pals!**_

* * *

_**PREVIEW OF THE NEXT CHAPTER! Here's a song from youtube that should give you an idea of the next chapter's theme...u.u not sure if aloud to do links but there's a first time for everything! **_

watch?v=bkhDy9CA6Dk

Type in

**Naruto Shippuden OST - Man Of The World**

exactly like that into youtube and you should get it. n_n it's a very beautiful song lol


	14. The Kadupul Flowers

_**I do not own Ouran Highschool Host Club and I wish I did. :P I'm extremely tired so bleh. **_

_**I can't believe this story is almost over! **_

_**Happy reading campers!**_

_**Btw YES I DID WRITE THE SONG YOU SEE HERE IN THE VERY BEGINNING!**_

* * *

_**Fading Twins…u.u**_

* * *

_Little baby brother of mine,_

_How can I reverse this awful time?_

_Blinded by my selfish pride,_

_While you had love that you only hide._

_My dear twin brother, do you forgive,_

_Me as I sat here taking this in?_

_As you were forced with fate and met him,_

_Running away from these terrible sins._

_Kaoru oh Kaoru how could this be?_

_We were such kids and lived foolishly,_

_There there now Kaoru, I want you to see,_

_That big brother's here and it not just a dream._

_Sweet little brother, won't you wake up now?_

_You survived this far though I don't know how._

_I'll protect you from the eyes of the crowd,_

_Big brother's here to carry you out._

* * *

I heard a male's voice singing in the distance. It was so familiar, but I couldn't see. No, that's not quite right. I _can _see but what was before me was my worst fear. Darkness…. It was as if somebody took thousands of paint buckets and slung the black paint all over the walls. I started to tremble. Brother… I began to start walking around. There's no point in staying here if I know that I shouldn't be here. If you know you won't get your answers somewhere then why stay thinking that somehow they will magically appear? I stopped walking.

"I guess," I just looked at the black chalkboard like ground and thought of no one but Hikaru. "I guess for love. If I truly wanted to know if Hikaru loved me…..I should've asked him myself. Sometimes you don't get the answers if you don't ask the questions." I sighed and continued to walk forward.

After what seemed to be hours or possibly days, I heard something. I spun around looking frantically everywhere. No one was here. I turned around still looking back and finally gave up looking and just kept walking. I don't know how, but that song just kept repeating throughout this place but to where it sounds like it's just the wind and nothing more. It was so dark.

"I need a light or something." I mumbled. Again I heard some whispers. "Who's there!" I screamed spinning around in circles. I just kept looking around getting dizzier and dizzier. The voices of millions of small preschoolers laughing and singing were getting louder and louder to where I couldn't hear that song anymore. That song was the only thing that kept me sane in this bottomless pit of darkness! I just fell to my knees with my hands on my head and just shrieked. "MAKE IT STOP!" I just kept crying and crying. "SOMEBODY! MAKE IT STOP! IT HURTS! THEIR LAUGHING IS TOO MUCH!" As if it never happened and was jus t my imagination, everything was mute. Even the song.

"_In order to escape this place,_

_You must think of lovers' grace,_

_To treat a broken heart with lace,_

_And set all things that are misplaced."_

My eyes widened. A new song began. What is this! Brother, Zero, Hunny, ANYBODY! HELP ME!

* * *

_**Hikaru's POV**_

* * *

I just kept singing the lullaby I used to sing to Kaoru whenever he had nightmares only I changed some lyrics around a bit. My hand was curled around Kaoru's hand ever so gently. I looked down at Kaoru's sleeping pale face as he breathed into a tube that covered his mouth. Each time Kaoru exhaled, the plastic mouth piece became all foggy but when he inhaled, the fog went away. Kaoru's heart beat was steady but not anything to relax about. Any sign of change to Kaoru's pulse could be fatal. The nurse came into the room with medication and flowers. She swiftly came around the other side of the bed Kaoru was lying in. She set the flowers down on the night stand positioned right next to Kaoru's head. They were pretty but had a magical feel to them. They were bright white with long pointy petals and a long red like vine growing out of the center of the flowers attached to a small miniature yellow flower at the very tip of the red stem. I've never seen any flower like this one! I looked back up at the nurse whom was playing trying to get all the medications for Kaoru in order. She already exchanged the water bag thing and it continued to drip small amounts of water into a small container that will be shot through the iv and into my brother's veins. I stopped singing. As soon as I did something didn't feel right but I brushed it off.

"Excuse me, nurse?" I called the woman. She was pretty. Probably mid-twenties or early thirties at most. She looked up at me with her big brown eyes and her brown hair swayed when her head stopped as her eyes met mine with a warm welcoming smile.

"Yes? What is it dear?" She asked so calmly.

"Those flowers," I pointed towards the flowers with my head.

"Yes, what about them?"

"What kind are they?" She looked over at them and smiled even more.

"They're called the kadupul flower. One of the rarest flowers known." She explained looking at the flowers in awe.

"Why are they considered so rare?" I asked.

" Seeing the Kadupul flower bloom is a very rare experience among those that grow the flower. The Kadupul flower is native to Sri Lankan lands but still, the blooming of the flowers has rarely been spotted even by the locals. Kadupul flowers emit strange fragrance as it blooms during midnight. Strangely, these flowers immediately die during dawn. So in other words, Hikaru, this flower is rare to see let alone pluck. To see these flowers in a vase still alive completely amazes me." She finished. Did I just get schooled?

"Who sent them?" I asked curiously though I had a feeling of who it probably was.

"A boy named, Zero." She answered looking down as if to give respects in a way.

"Nurse, where is, Zero?" I asked. Why is she looking so….sad? The nurse looked up at me with slight tears in her eyes.

"He handed these flowers to me to give to, Kaoru, this morning as I was just getting out of my car. He didn't once look at me but I knew those eyes had nothing to look at me with. I've never seen a kid so down." She explained sympathetically. "Afterwards he turned around with his hands in his pocket and just walked away without another word." The nurse was beginning to cry. "That boy had death in his eyes!"

My eyes widened and I gasped. He wouldn't…..he wouldn't feel that guilty would he? That he was to blame for everything that happened to Kaoru? No. He just wouldn't… My eyes narrowed as they shook.

* * *

_**Kaoru's POV**_

* * *

I sat there in complete silence doing nothing but having my eyes closed. How do I get out of here? Something brushed against my skin. So cool and soft yet it tickled at the touch. I barely opened my eyes until I felt it again. Eyes flashing open completely, I realized that I could see. There wasn't a dark environment surrounding me anymore, instead a brightly lit white world was in front of me. White petals were falling like snow. I only saw white and the petals. Nothing made noise though, not even myself. Cold chills ran up and down my back. What is this place? How did I get here? How do I get out? Brother, I'm scared. Help me.

The petals kept falling but as soon as they touched the ground they disintegrated beautifully like sand blowing around in the wind. Who wouldn't stop and stare at this? These flower petals..I've seen them before…. Oh yes, I remember now! Zero, told me once before that there was a mythical flower called the Kadupul flower that only bloomed during the night and died when dawn came. He promised to get me those flowers some day since I remind him of how mythical they were.

* * *

"_Kaoru, kadupuls are rare to find, beautiful, have mystery, never last long, and if anything rare to ever obtain." Zero explained to me as he showed me pictures of this rare flower. "Kaoru, you're my Kadupul flower."_

_I blushed and we both laughed._

"_Okay then, Zero, you're my blue rose." I announced. Zero smiled and rustled my hair._

"_Perfect." He agreed._

_I smiled up at him._

* * *

Tears streamed down my face. Why is this all happening to me? I once again fell to my knees burying my face in my hands. I'm scared of the cluttered noises in the dark and now the silence in the light. I need another person with me! I need somebody to tell me it'll be okay! I'm scared! Just so scared….Shaking was all I could manage to do at this point. Is this another dream like before?

* * *

_**Zero's POV**_

* * *

It's my entire fault. How could I shoot Kaoru? Of all people to! I can't ever forgive myself for doing such a cruel thing to him. I know that Kaoru will say, 'No, Zero, it's okay. It was by accident!' then smile at me with that famous fake smile of his. He hides too many things. Kaoru, I shouldn't have had a gun pointed at you in the first place! I walked into the hospital parking lot and spotted a nurse that I remember seeing help Kaoru's wounds. I walked straight towards her with a vase full of flowers that glowed brightly in the sun as the sun rose high in the sky. The nurse turned around after closing the door and stumbled back from almost running into me.

"May I help you sir?" She asked unsure. I just kept my head down and bluntly shoved the vase into her arms. "Sir?"

"Give those to, Kaoru Hitachiin. Tell him it's from Zero…Zero Amarante." I choked. I didn't want to speak anymore now. With that, I turned around and just walked away. Kaoru, I'm so so sorry…

After hours of walking I entered my woods and reached into my pocket and pulled out that gun. I looked at it and wrinkled my nose. Tainted metal has no use to me….. As I was looking at my reflection in the glare of the steel, flashbacks of Kaoru's twisted face disturbed from pain just kept coming back. I began to stumble backwards. Stop it… The repeats just kept coming. STOP IT! I just kept screaming. I held the gun and closed my eyes.

"Make it stop!" I cried out and pulled the trigger.

A huge group of birds swarmed out of the tress.

* * *

_**Kaoru's POV**_

* * *

All was still quite as it had been for the last few hours. I gave up on trying to escape. What's the point if I can't even find my way around here? I sighd and crossed my legs as I sat down on the ground. The petals still continued to keep falling but then those petals frozen where they were in the air and just like magic, those petals morphed into doves flying away as if startled. Ince the birds cleared I saw a shadowy figure standing a few feet from me. He was holding something in his hands and when he finally noticed me he looked at his hand and slowly lifted his arm. Was he pointing something at me? It was then that I could make out the weapon in this person's hand. A gun. I could do nothing as we just stood there in bright lights. I heard him move his finger against the trigger. It dawned on me who it was. I started to make a run towards, Zero, outreaching my arm for him to grab.

"Zero, wait! Stop!" I called out. I was just a few steps from him but then he fired…

My eyes flashed opened and I sat up instantly. My body screamed in protest and had me cough and gasp for air. I could barely see. Everything sounded so muffled and everything looked so blurry. I could feel somebody hugging me tightly and speaking to me but I couldn't grasp what that person was saying and who they even were. I saw something in the corner of my eye and slowly turned my head to get a better look at it. There in a vase were Kadupul flowers. Zero… I narrowed my eyes and looked down at my hands that were lying down so helplessly in my lap.

* * *

_**Whoooo! Intense, sad, and if not anything else but a little confusing in some ways lol.**_

_**DO NOT KILL ME! IF YOU KILL THE AUTHOR THEN YOU'LL NEVER GET TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS IN THE END!**_

_**There are two songs for this chapter really…**_

_**Man of the World – Naruto Shippuden OST**_

_**In the Dark – Flyleaf**_

_**LOVE YOU ALL!**_


	15. Lifting

_**I do not own Ouran Highschool Host club! I really wish I did but dammit I don't!**_

_**Gasp! It's the finale chapter of Fading Twins, but never fear my almost rampaging fans, for I have a surprise for you at the end of this chapter! So please put down those flaming torches and pitch forks and read the chapter to your heart's content! xD**_

* * *

_**I have an elricest story up and running to by the way! It's called **_

_**Just Another Taboo**_

_**Three chapters are already up and soon a fourth one as well! **_

* * *

_**Song of this chapter is: Hitohira no Hanabira**_

* * *

_**Fading Twins**_

* * *

"How is he doing?" Mom asked Hikaru outside my room. Idiots, I can still hear perfectly fine.

"I don't know. He won't speak, eat or even look up." Hikaru explained.

"Well, either way, the doctors said he can be released whenever. We're lucky that bullet didn't break Kaoru's arm." Dad said sternly. "Your mother and I will be leaving tomorrow morning first thing."

"You're leaving already?" Hikaru asked sadly.

There was no need for any answer really. Hikaru and I have grown up to not having our parents around a lot. It was like nature and breathing, it just happens, end of story. Footsteps walked away and my hospital room door opened slowly and squeaky.

"Damn door." Hikaru muttered before turning his attention towards me. From the corner of my eye I could plainly see the heavy bluish bags underneath Hikaru's eyes. Hikaru…"Kaoru, pack your bags, It's time to get the hell out of here!" I did nothing but nod and scoot to the edge. I was practically a mute or a mime…..I like mime better. Mimes can be pretty annoying even though they can't speak but mimes remind me of Pokémon, there's a Pokémon called Mr. Mime, Mr. Mime is a mime, and ergo I am a mime Pokémon. I call that first class success. Every mute is Mr. Mime. Makes all the more sense to me if a child is a mute and is called Mime Jr. Wait, what was I talking about again?

"Kaoru, please talk to me." Hikaru pleaded. How could I? I should've gotten rid of that gun quickly and not allow Zero to shoot me. It was on the news to of course. Zero, the one guy I wanted to help, shot himself in the head in the woods when we first met. Tears stung and threatened to fall. This is my entire fault. If I never ran away, if I never was selfish and wanted Hikaru, this-this wouldn't have happened at all….no…if I wasn't even born! I slammed the night stand doors shut due to irritation. Zero, please please forgive me!

"Sir, are you ready?" That nurse asked me with a wheelchair by her side. I nodded and sat down. Hikaru was gone of course, probably helping out with release papers. I needed to know something though…

"Nurse?" I asked.

"It's Risa, Risa Miyagi." She corrected nicely.

"The person who gave me those flowers," I started.

"Zero Amarante." She answered knowing what my question would be.

"Th-Thank you." I sniffled and went back to looking down.

We arrived at the elevator and Risa pressed the button going down. Amarante…Where have I heard that name before? There was a '_ding_' and the double doors opened. A few busy people walked out quickly both on cellphones and schedules in their hands. She pushed me in and the doors closed behind her. Risa spun me around to face the doors again and pressed a button. Then the elevator went down. Amarante…..gosh this is seriously nagging me! Even his last name won't come to my mind. I know what it means but it's fading away from my memories! I shut my eyes tightly and kept thinking. Amarante, flower that….flower that…..ugh this will never work! I'll have to look it up sometime. Again the elevator made a '_ding_' and the doors once again opened. My mirror reflection was there smiling down at me. I couldn't smile though, how could I?

Risa grabbed my wheelchair's handle bars and continued to push me along. Hikaru, was walking along side me as if he were my body guard ready to strike down anyone who came near his precious little brother. I mentally sighed. Amarante…flower that…..

"Hey, Hikaru..." I said through a broken voice.

"Yeah?"

"What does, Amarante, mean?" I asked hoping he knew.

"It means, Flower that never fades." He explained. "Why?"

"Oh nothing." I quickly defended. Flower that never fades? My fading blue rose? Zero is fading, I can't smell him anymore, and it's my entire fault.

As the wheelchair came to a slow stop, the nurse came around to face me and help me up. It took a while but I finally managed to do it. I stretched my arms and legs a bit and just lifelessly walked passed Hikaru. I got into the car without a single word.

* * *

We arrived at the house and I opened the door and jumped out of the car. My arm felt great now, no pain at all. The huge mansion filled my vision and nearly knocked me off my feet. How long have I been gone? It's so weird to see how big my home really is! Hikaru wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pressed his cheek to mine. Our parents closed the trunk of the car and walked towards us.

"Let's go inside shall we?" Mom said excitedly with a fake smile.

_How?_

"Yeah, come on let's go, Kaoru!" Hikaru shouted, grabbing my wrist and dragging me along to the front door.

_How can they be so calm?_

We made it inside and gave the maids my bags to unpack. Then we all made our way to the family den. A huge fireplace, that was already started, was the main focal view of the room. Sure, there were pictures, chairs, rugs, and such but nobody can look passed that blazing fire. Hikaru, whom was still holding onto my wrist for dear life, walked me over towards the couch and sat us both down with a huge grin on his face.

_How can they?_

"Would anyone like tea?" A maid asked so kindly.

"Yeah, that would be lovely." Mom agreed sweetly. The maid bowed and went off.

_After everything that happened…._

"So how are you two boys doing?" Dad asked with forced interest.

_How can they act like nothing happened! Like how I love Hikaru, or how Hikaru kissed me? Do they plan to brush it off like nothing! Hikaru, would you to? Forget about Zero's existence as if it to were nothing? How? Just HOW!_

The maid came back inside the room and placed our cups of tea down on the table. "I've been doing great! What about you, Kaoru?" Hikaru asked but before he could completely finish I slammed my fists down against the glass table knocking over the cups and spilling the tea everywhere making a few cracks in it. My whole body was shaking in outrage. "K-Kaoru?" Hikaru lightly placed his hand on my shoulder but I knocked it off harshly.

"How….after all that happened, after everything that you found out, after _all _this time," I looked in with tears streaming down my face with my eyes narrowed and wide. "How can you act like none of this happened! A boy died for me, I mean a boy _killed _himself _because _of me! How the living _fuck _do you forget something like that!" I finished gasping for air and continuing to cry in pain, sadness, and betrayal. It was as if a large weight was taken off of my shoulders. It felt great saying that to and I have no regrets. Everyone was wide eyed at my sudden outburst.

"Kaoru Hitachiin, don't you dare swear at us!" Mom and dad shouted together.

"Or else what? You'll leave again? Sorry princess and prince _charming_, but I really don't care. After everything that's happened, I'd gladly welcome death!" I spitted with as much venom as I could muster.

"K-Kaoru…" I didn't want to hear it from Hikaru either. I got up and ran off towards the front door. It was raining now; literally storming, but it didn't stop me. I just ran for my life. I'm not staying here; they can't make me come back! "KAORU!" Hikaru called for me. I heard quick squishy footsteps follow behind me. Flashes struck the skies and thunder roared like an angry defensive lion. I saw it though, the woods where I met Zero for the first time and where I left everything else behind. Kaoru, please stop!" Hikaru pleaded. I could tell he was crying.

"No!" I answered back and sped up entering the nostalgic forest.

I leapt over every boulder and rotting tree trunk, ducked under every branch. I flinched every time Hikaru called out my name and thunder roared. If Hikaru catches me now, I'll defiantly give in, after all, I still love him. I rounded a tree trunk and found myself once again inside that hollow tree trunk and sat down. It was still perfectly dry and safe in here. It looked like it was meant for campers. Weird.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru called out panting for air. "Kaoru, where are you! Please answer me!" He just kept calling out my name. I wanted to cry, I got into the fetal position and covered my ears with my hands.

_Just go away! Please? Just get out of here. If you don't... I'll…. I'll… I'll cave in and forget about, Zero!_

"K-Kaoru, I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I know that doesn't even come close to making up everything that I've done to you, but I mean every word. I read your journal the night you left, and I read what you wrote about me and Haruhi and how you were planning to run away. I got so angry and knew I could still get you but my pride of an older sibiling got in the way. I was mad at not you, but myself. As your only older brother, I should've known that something was wrong from the very start. I should've looked harder for you instead of just returning back home. I SHOULD'VE LOOKED BACK, DAMMIT! I'm sorry Kaoru, I'm so sorry!" Hikaru was crying and calling out my name. My heart beckoned for me to go to him but I stood still. Hours passed and I finally didn't hear anything. All was quite. Did he leave me again? It was still storming so I guess he wouldn't stick around in a storm, even for me. I slowly scooted up and slowly made my way out of the hollow trunk.

"Not even for me…" I whispered letting out a few more tears.

I felt a pair of warm arms wrap around my waist from behind. I gasped and turned my head to the side and saw Hikaru grinning down at me. A slight blush made its way to my cheek but my eyes continued to cry not for pain but for happiness. He did stay… Hikaru bent his head down to press his lips to my ear.

"I don't give up that easily, Kaoru." Hikaru whispered huskily into my ear before biting it. I shuddered. Hikaru pulled my closer to him while backing up into the hollow trunk.

"H-Hikaru!" I squeaked, "H-How did y-you kn-know?" I stuttered. Hikaru chuckled and kissed down my neck.

"I could see you go inside. I'm not stupid, Kaoru." He whispered against my neck then nipped at it. My breath was caught in my throat. "Oh, so you like that huh?" I could feel his smirk against my skin.

Hikaru spun me around and pushed me up against the wall of the trunk. He pinned my wrists above my head and went straight for my neck. He kissed it, then traced it with his tongue, and finally bit into it. I cried out in pleasure. _No, I can't give in! But, but it felt so right. _He kept going down my throat sucking and biting moving towards my collar bone.

"S-Stop!" I shouted weakly. Hikaru instantly stopped and looked at me confused.

"Why?" He asked gently.

"I don't want to forget." I answered shyly.

"What do you mean, Kaoru?" What don't you want to forget?" He pushed.

"I don't want to forget, Zero!" I screamed with fresh tears pouring down my cheeks.

"Noone's saying you have to…" He tried to reassure me.

"It-It should've been me that died, Hikaru!" I barked back at him, his eyes widened. "If I never met him, or even fell in love with you, this all wouldn't have happen! I'm an idiot! So now Zero killed himself because of me! It would've been better if I was never even bo-"

"Shut up!" Hikaru cut me off. He too was crying but with angered eyes. "Just shut up! I don't ever want to hear you say those words again! It wasn't your fault, Kaoru! None of this was your fault! It's mine! My burden to carry. I should've been a better big brother but I wasn't and this all happened! It's my fault, not yours!" Hikaru was sobbing now. "Don't scare me like that again, Kaoru. Please…. just please don't." Hikaru had his head down hiding his eyes from me. Hikaru….. I lifted his head so our eyes could meet with each others'. "K-Kaoru, I love you." My eyes filled with tears. Oh how I longed to hear him say those words.

I brought our lips together and sparks flew. His lips against mine was like heaven. It was like nothing else mattered, like we were the only ones that existed. Hikaru trailed his tongue along my lower lip, I eagerly let him in and our tongues fought for dominance. Again, Hikaru gently pinned my hands above my head and used one of his handsto snake its way under my shirt to feel my chest. I moaned into his mouth and blushed beet red. Hikaru chuckled and deepened the kiss even more. From there on things led to another and next thing I know I'm lying down on top of my older twin whom was asleep. I rested my head against his chest and counted the many times his chest fell and rose between each breathes he took. His heart beat was my calming lullaby while the thunder continued to roar. Hikaru's arms were around my waist in a protective way that made me feel secure. After everything that's happened, I can now go to sleep knowing that Hikaru will be still here knowing that I can see him as a brother _and _ a lover. Zero will always be in my heart as the twin that never fades even as my blue rose. The world was once again right. I can finally close my eyes with a smile.

* * *

_A single flower petal brushes against my skin_

_I don't want to believe_

_our romance was a mistake_

_You have a dark face, on the other side of the phone_

_You were scared of the words that were to come out_

_From when did we try not to realize feelings like this?_

_In the clear wind, like the day we met_

_if we can do it all over_

_I want to be with you_

_A single flower petal brushes against my skin_

_I don't want to believe_

_our romance was a mistake_

_I should have been in love_

_so much that if I wanted to hear your voice anytime_

_Even though my hands reach out_

_you seem to be fading away_

_We've got a bad, bad habit of saying "everything's fine" and bottling it up_

_I always thought about how i wanted to be with you forever_

_but we don't see eye to eye_

_I assumed i could always make you smile_

_in that soft, gentle way of yours_

_like when we first met_

_I want to hold you..._

_A single flower petal brushes against my skin_

_I don't want to believe_

_our romance was a mistake_

_The palm of yours_

_who has kept it silent_

_the tears that reached they splashed_

_Please rewind time for us who've become like this_

_A single flower fluttered down beside me now_

_I can't possibly forget it_

_thinking it was a mistake_

_I thought I loved you_

_I wanted to hear your voice more and more_

_and while my hand still reaches yours,_

_I can't see what your future holds._

* * *

"_What's that?" asked a voice talking into a phone. _

"_It appears the twins have fallen in love." Answered a voice from the other line of the phone._

"_Perfect, this makes this whole thing even better." Laughed the voice. "The games will all begin very soon." The phone is hung up._

* * *

_**I have to point out that yes I knew that Amarante means 'flower' but I didn't realize that it really did mean 'Flower that never fades' When I found this out I was like, "Holy shit, that's just scary!" What with the title and all. Haha. The song is a bonus as well lol.**_

* * *

_**THE SURPRISE I PROMISED!**_

_**There will be a book number 2! :{D excited yet? No? Well…..damn. **_

_**It will be called **_

_Forsaken Twins_

_**I hope you're excited as much as I am!**_

_**You all have been wonderful! I loved reading your comments and support! It really means a lot to me! n_n I hope to see you commenting on the next story!**_

* * *

_**Well im off to watch this movie my friend recommended to me called, "Suicide Room" hmm...**_

* * *

_**Peace. Love. Have a bagel. **_


	16. Announcement : New Story

The new story is now up everyone! Book 2 is finally released! Lol

Forsaken Twins will defiantly be a fun story to work with and I'm very excited and eager to see what your thoughts are on it! Happy reading!

I honestly don't know why im making such a big deal out of it but i guess so you know that it's actually posted now. lol xD kk bye!

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**Derp derp doo blah doo blah fah fah la la la!**

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**Toodles!**


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